Russell's favourite joke

Everyone loves laugthing at other peoples misery and this guy must be one most mis
https://www.thestar.co.uk/news/I-threw-away-100000.6245268.jp
This guy threw away one of only 3 £100,000 lottery scratchcard tickets.

Sorry for posting again but i just found this and it beats my previous story by a mile

Marmite are taking legal action against the BNP, because the BNP used marmite to promote themself. What kind of desperate pollitical party uses marmite to get votes.
Made me laugh alot so enjoy.

https://news.sky.com/skynews/Home/UK-News/Marmite-BNP-Company-Issues-Legal-Action-Injunction-Against-British-National-Party/Article/201004415613050?lpos=UK_News_News_Your_Way_Region_1&lid=NewsYourWay_ARTICLE_15613050_Marmite_BNP%3A_Company_Issues_Legal_Action_Injunction_Against_British_National_Party

Hey Russell

I've got a question...

Do you ever watch the show at home when it comes on tv? Or is that just a bit wierd?

And one for good luck...
Do you like cake? Have you ever had any interesting cake incidents?

I love the show- it really cheers me up

Lots of love
xxx

Cow food is blamed for high ozone levels in California valleys haha

https://www.usnews.com/science/articles/2010/04/23/study-cow-feed-may-be-causing-air-problem.html

Good luck on Sunday, Love the show xx

Hey, i found this video, that i thought was really inspiring and nice for 'it's not all doom & gloom (: . https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dKpBeIa3sV0&feature=related

some people in my college where watching this today, when we where all hard at work of course, and when i got home i looked for it on youtube to see what was so funny ... dunno if you seen this but its the wife's face that gets me ...

Psycho "Barking Dog Man" on the News!!! High Quality
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BR6DaBawsZI

love the show, especlally the nice story's at the end

i wonder what is going on in the royal family this first camiler now phillip

https://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/8641244.stm

Hey Russel!
Saw this online and it made me chuckle
FAMOUS FOOTBALLERS DONE SELF-PORTRAITS!!!!!
https://news.sky.com/skynews/Home/video/Self-portrait-Footballers-Draw-Rooney-Gerrard-Drogba-Ferdinand-charity-Nordoff-Robbins/Video/201004215598090
Love the show!!!
Bye!!

-Chris Potts

Hey Russ,

What's your favourite CHEESE?

I remember someone yelled it out at the Birmingham gig on your Dingledodies tour, but I can't remember what you said.. was it brie? It's an important question as you can tell a lot about a man by his taste in cheese..

Also Russell,

I have recently found this site of funny news, I think it's mainly America, but it's amusing all the same!

https://www.womples.com/

I love the show, it makes me laugh out loud, you must love your job. Do you get nervous when you do the show?
I think I would, don't know how you do it :)!

Thought this story was funny
Kings Cross: Busy London train station 'closed by burning toast fire alert'
One of London’s busiest train stations was closed twice after staff left their burning toast unattended, it was claimed.
https://www.telegraph.co.uk/travel/travelnews/7620986/Busy-London-train-station-closed-by-burning-toast-fire-alert.html

Two things to make you smile

Well the first will make you cross your legs and yell 'why' (girls and guys, regardless) https://www.news.com.au/world/jilted-javan-teen-chops-off-penis-and-tosses-it-down-a-well/story-e6frfkyi-1225847490180?from=igoogle%20gadget%20compact%20news_rss (seriously, why - my favourite bit of it is that it went missing....where?)

Second thing remains one of the most moving things I have ever seen on the internet. It shows the unconditional love that exists in all of us (get your tissues ready for 4.30mins) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=flRvsO8m_KI

Well done for inspiring people to look for the good news in life. Wouldn't it be a cool day when 'and finally' becomes the negative bit at the end of the news ;)

J:)

HELLO (:

what is the funniest or favourite dream you've ever had?
xo

Sorry for posting again, very bored and I've found another headline.

Driver escapes jail despite 'driving down busy motorway with leg out of window'
https://www.telegraph.co.uk/motoring/news/7620484/Driver-escapes-jail-despite-driving-down-busy-motorway-with-leg-hanging-out.html

Hiii! Question for Russell

What is the wierdest thing that a complete stranger has ever said to you??

AND

Who has been your favourite or the scariest mystery guest?

Love the show thanks soo much for doing this!!

xx

Do you read all of the comments that you get on this blog even if there is millions or do you just read some recent ones??

Hey, I have a question for Russ about his tour!

What's with doing Cardiff on a Tuesday night?? Seriously, what are the chances of getting a babysitter and trecking from Brizzle to Cardiff on a school night - not likely :-S Maybe you could change it an arena tour plus the colston hall?????? xxx

Russell should definately have a look at this article https://www.flashnews.com/news/wfn1100405J15041.html

A couple more for you to enjoy

Burgalars steal Tv.s from a jail...Twice
https://news.sky.com/skynews/Home/Strange-News/Netherlands-Burglars-Break-Into-Prison-Near-Amsterdam-To-Steal-Inmates-TVs/Article/201004415612869?lpos=Strange_News_Second_Strange_News__Article_Teaser_Region__0&lid=ARTICLE_15612869_Netherlands%3A_Burglars_Break_Into_Prison_Near_Amsterdam_To_Steal_Inmates_TVs

China trys to cover bad smell of rubbish tips with deodarant cans.
https://news.sky.com/skynews/Home/Strange-News/Beijing-Blasts-Rubbish-Dumps-With-Deodorant-Cannons-As-Weather-Causes-More-Waste-To-Rot/Article/201004415616406?lpos=Strange_News_First_Strange_News__Article_Teaser_Region__0&lid=ARTICLE_15616406_Beijing_Blasts_Rubbish_Dumps_With_Deodorant_Cannons_As_Weather_Causes_More_Waste_To_Rot

And mother gives birth to a baby weighing 13lbs and 15oz!
https://news.sky.com/skynews/Home/UK-News/Big-Baby-Harry-Weighs-In-At-13lbs-And-15-Oz-At-Birth-Biggest-Ever-Delivered-At-Doncaster-Hospital/Article/201004415614865?lpos=UK_News_News_Your_Way_Region_7&lid=NewsYourWay_ARTICLE_15614865_Big_Baby_Harry_Weighs_In_At_13lbs_And_15_Oz_At_Birth%3A_Biggest_Ever_Delivered_At_Doncaster_Hospital

found this https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-world/2010/04/12/girl-s-switch-to-german-115875-22179799/ i can just tell what u could do with that hope it helps

saw this and thought it was pretty funny - https://www.inquisitr.com/wp-content/sign-has-sharp-edges.jpg

good luck with the marathon tomorrow Russell :D
xxxxx

Theres A Facebook Group For You ' Vote Russell Howard For Prime Minister'

https://www.facebook.com/?ref=logo#!/group.php?gid=114753541886569

Thanks for answering my question Russell, and good luck with the marathon..!!!
xxxx

hello, once again a big thank you for featuring one of my stories on show 5 the one about the cook book really appreciated it again im back with some more random stories

my first story is that a man in Los Angeles awoke to find a baby seal on his roof with no explanation as to how it got there (link below)

https://news.sky.com/skynews/Home/Strange-News/Sea-Lion-On-The-Roof-Of-Los-Angeles-Mans-Roof-Mike-Kai-Snaps-Seal-Pup-Stranded-In-Newport-Beach/Article/201004415614885?lpos=Strange_News_First_Strange_News__Article_Teaser_Region__2&lid=ARTICLE_15614885_Sea_Lion_On_The_Roof_Of_Los_Angeles_Mans_Roof%3A_Mike_Kai_Snaps_Seal_Pup_Stranded_In_Newport_Beach

and my second story is that china think they have found the answer to stop their beijing landfill site from smelling...how?......by using deodrant! lol (link below)

https://news.sky.com/skynews/Home/Strange-News/Sea-Lion-On-The-Roof-Of-Los-Angeles-Mans-Roof-Mike-Kai-Snaps-Seal-Pup-Stranded-In-Newport-Beach/Article/201004415614885?lpos=Strange_News_First_Strange_News__Article_Teaser_Region__2&lid=ARTICLE_15614885_Sea_Lion_On_The_Roof_Of_Los_Angeles_Mans_Roof%3A_Mike_Kai_Snaps_Seal_Pup_Stranded_In_Newport_Beach

hope they get read out and thank again for reading my stories out

siobhan x

sorry i just seen that someone has reported the deodrant can story

so ive found another pensioner gangster!!! but he is generally known as the "geezer bandit" he has elegedly stolen money from 7 banks in San Diego (link below)

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/7622076/Elderly-Geezer-bandit-bank-robber-strikes-again.html

thanks x

the stand-up this week was hilarious not heard of him before but funny all the same =D





*sam*

The stand up comedy guest was hilarious this week, great choice guys!

I would love to see Russell take the pi*s out of the content the BNP have on their leaflets, some of which include...

"Women enjoy sex, therefore rape is healthy/legal/fair" (i can't remember exactly).

So idiotic, I feel Russell would have a field day with that.

Really enjoying the series.
I don't know if this is the kind of thing your looking for, but...
Caught this story on BBC News channel, must have been Tuesday night, marking the return of HMS Albion to Portsmouth.
https://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/8636171.stm
The reporter manages to speak with Borris Johnsons father, who is returning as a stranded UK tourist. The actual conversation is both very patriotic and the video funny to watch, you'll understand why when you've seen it. (The video on the website doesn't capture the conversation)
Keep up the good work

Hello, Russell hope you are well, my question to you is as a child when ever you were naughty, did you ever get grounded?
and when and if you where grounded did you ever get out of it if so how? or did you take advantage of the situation.

Best wishes,
Alison.

Read this and could just hear Russell reading out the suggestions for the Pope's visit so had to share


https://news.sky.com/skynews/Home/Politics/Popes-Visit-Foreign-Office-Apologises-After-Memo-Suggests-Benedict-XVI-Should-Open-Abortion-Clinic/Article/201004415619252?lpos=Politics_News_Your_Way_Region_0&lid=NewsYourWay_ARTICLE_15619252_Popes_Visit%3A_Foreign_Office_Apologises_After_Memo_Suggests_Benedict_XVI_Should_Open_Abortion_Clinic

Good luck with the Matharon tomorrow

iv'e got some great news for you
at the age of 24 i have finally hit puberty

I think your really charismatic, alongside your humour, and although you probably dont need any chat up lines what was your favourite youv either heard or used?

steph :) x

https://www.itv.com/itvplayer/video/?Filter=140211 stop at 11:03
Vernon Kay in an uncompromising position with contestant Jeff!
The Whole 19 yards Saturdays episode!

Hiya just a wee question, what is

the weirdest dream you have ever had?

*Sam*

Have a look at yatta on youtube.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rW6M8D41ZWU

if you can work it out let me know. im confused

Hiya Russ :)
Good luck to you, your brother and sister for the marathon today!

My mum found a story about some british lady that used to get really bad migranes and when the migranes had gone, she would unwittingly start speaking in a chinese accent.
(We though it would be funny for the 5th show, when you said about 'stubbing your toe')

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/health/healthnews/7606587/Migraine-sufferer-starts-speaking-with-Chinese-accent.html

Lots of love :)
Xxxxx

Just found another story, I don't even know what to say about it!

https://www.reuters.com/article/idUSTRE63L41920100422

Again, good luck for the marathon Russ :)
Lots of love.
Xxxxx

you should feature this organization on the show they do fantastic work in the community without trying to "convert" people they just help,
https://www.streetpastors.co.uk/

If you could have any super power, what would it be?

The B.N.P. supporters in Barnsley cant even spell the party's name right!!!!
I nearly crashed me car as I drove past laughing!!
https://www.facebook.com/photo_search.php?oid=233382206411&view=all#!/photo.php?pid=5131673&id=610867447

Hey! :)

Found some random stories while wasting far too much time on the net - enjoy!!

Very sweet story - dog leads cops to fire at house

https://abcnews.go.com/GMA/video/heroic-dog-leads-cops-fire-10456419


'Gay' seeing eye dog refused entry into resaurant

https://uk.news.yahoo.com/18/20100425/tod-gay-dog-refused-entry-to-australian-37b0eca.html


Burglars break into PRISONS to steal tv-sets

https://uk.news.yahoo.com/5/20100422/tod-burglars-break-into-dutch-jail-to-st-870a197.html


Briton starts speaking with a chinese accent after a migraine - how embarrassed would you be?? May stand out as she lives in Plymouth!!

https://uk.news.yahoo.com/18/20100420/tod-briton-gets-chinese-accent-after-bad-6058bda.html


Man misunderstands scratchcard rules and throws away 100,000 grand!!

https://news.sky.com/skynews/Home/UK-News/Lottery-Scratchcard-Misery-Cemal-Celikkanat-Loses-100000-After-Not-Understanding-Rules-Of-Game/Article/201004415613416?lpos=UK_News_First_Strange_News__Feature_Teaser_Region__0&lid=ARTICLE_15613416_Lottery_Scratchcard_Misery%3A_Cemal_Celikkanat_Loses_%3F100%2C000_After_Not_Understanding_Rules_Of_Game

Niki x

https://www.inthenews.co.uk/news/bnp-leader-griffins-compares-east-london-to-nairobi-$1374099.htm

Made me smile :)The video is on sky news but the link wouldnt work.
Question for Russell, What is your favriote tv programme? And, Who is your favirote comedian??

Love the show, keep it up :)

Emma xx

heyy
just a questionn to ask Russell
If you had to be stranded on a desert island with anyone in the world, who would it be and why?
thaanks (:

Apparently, Britons believe there are haggis roaming around the hills of Scotland.

https://www.reuters.com/article/idUSTRE63M3L820100423?loomia_ow=t0:s0:a49:g43:r1:c0.381379:b33253448:z0

Enjoy your 'boost'. Hope your feet recover before you film the show. x

Hello Russell and Good News team! i just had to share this story i found in the M.E.N paper on friday afternoon! i found it hilarious....

CAKE THEIF'S LATE CONFESSION TAKES THE BISCUIT!

YORKSHIRE..A man who stole a packet of Jaffa Cakes from his employer 50 years ago was so racked with guilt he tracked down his former boss to reimburse him.

John Bibby,65,from York,was working at a holiday camp in Skipsea, East Yorkshire, in 1960 when he took the cakes from Les Simpson. He traced Mr Simpson to Beverley, East Yorkshire, bought a box of the cakes and confessed his crime.

Mr Simpson,79,knew nothing about the theft and was "shell-shocked" at Mr Bibby's confession.

Is it just me or this story just pure genius! i would lovvvve it to get mentioned on the show or on russell's video blog!..which brings me to ask a question to russell for his blog in relation to this story haha..have u ever commited a crime as shocking as this one?!

Hi russell am really disappointed because i went to the marathon today to support my mum and i didn't see you even though we went to 3 different places but on the bright side i saw richard branson as a butterfly. Well done for running though and i can't wait to see you do the nse evening my question to you is if you had to marry any male celebrity who would it be?

heya this is not a news story but it's a true story it's kinda soppy but see what you think pretty long mind you but anyway....

Lucky Dog.......

Anyone who has pets will really like this. You'll like it even if you don't and you may even decide you need one!



Mary and her husband Jim had a dog named 'Lucky.'

Lucky was a real character. Whenever Mary and Jim had company come for a weekend visit they would warn their friends to not leave their luggage open because Lucky would help himself to whatever struck his fancy. Inevitably, someone would forget and something would come up missing.


Mary or Jim would go to Lucky's toy box in the basement and there the treasure would be, amid all of Lucky's other favorite toys Lucky always stashed his finds in his toy box and he was very particular that his toys stay in the box..

It happened that Mary found out she had breast cancer. Something told her she was going to die of this disease....in fact; she was just sure it was fatal.

She scheduled the double mastectomy, fear riding her shoulders. The night before she was to go to the hospital she cuddled with Lucky. A thought struck her...what would happen to Lucky? Although the three-year-old dog liked Jim, he was Mary's dog through and through. If I die, Lucky will be abandoned, Mary thought. He won't understand that I didn't want to leave him! The thought made her sadder than thinking of her own death.

The double mastectomy was harder on Mary than her doctors had anticipated and Mary was hospitalized for over two weeks. Jim took Lucky for his evening walk faithfully, but the little dog just drooped, whining and miserable.

Finally the day came for Mary to leave the hospital. When she arrived home, Mary was so exhausted she couldn't even make it up the steps to her bedroom. Jim made his wife comfortable on the couch and left her to nap.

Lucky stood watching Mary but he didn't come to her when she called. It made Mary sad but sleep soon overcame her and she dozed.


When Mary woke for a second she couldn't understand what was wrong. She couldn't move her head and her body f felt heavy and hot. But panic soon gave way to laughter when Mary realized the problem. She was covered, literally blanketed, with every treasure Lucky owned! While she had slept, the sorrowing dog had made trip after trip to the basement bringing his beloved mistress all his favorite things in life.
He had covered her with his love.
Mary forgot about dying. Instead she and Lucky began living again, walking further and further together every day. It's been 12 years now and Mary is still cancer-free. Lucky He still steals treasures and stashes them in his toy box but Mary remains his greatest treasure.


Remember....live every day to the fullest. Each minute is a blessing from God. And never forget....the people who make a difference in our lives are not the ones with the most Credentials, the most money, or the most awards. They are the ones that care for us.

If you see someone without a smile today give them one of yours! Live simply. Love seriously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God
A small request

All you are asked to do is keep this circulating.

Dear God, I pray for the cure of cancer.
Amen

All you are asked to do is keep this circulating, even if it is only to one more person, in memory of anyone you know that has been struck down by cancer or is still fighting their battle.

hey, just saw these stories about weird marriages and thought they were funny! Hope you enjoy :)
https://www.oddee.com/item_97042.aspx
Georgia and Fran x

hiya russel,

my boyfriend (Jack Symonds) stumbled across this news story last week and i thought it would be a good one for the show

check out this link: https://www.escapistmagazine.com/news/view/99974-Woman-Falls-Off-Wii-Balance-Board-Turns-Into-Nymphomaniac
its a truely hilarious story with some great quotes in it! i hope you enjoy it!

x

Robot mouth...speaks for its self.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=57zsMfuTk1U

Hey,

Loving the show and have this old gem to share:

In May 2007 it was asked how unrelated Islamic men and women could work together in the same office, when Islam forbids men and women who aren’t married or related to be alone together.
The answer was hilarious: let the woman suckle the man 5 times. Apparently this would diffuse all sexual tension in the office whilst also making the woman the foster mother of who she suckles.

*shudder*

https://www.nytimes.com/2007/06/11/world/africa/11iht-fatwa.4.6098135.html

Oh, I've just found a new game that you might enjoy the results of.

In Google type the start of a question so the drop-down of suggested searches comes up, however try things like "My Socks".

Seriously, it's hilarious!

Hello :) ;

I Saw This On A News Website And Thout You Might Like It ;
https://www.reuters.com/article/idUSTRE63M3LF20100423
'Police Barred From Penis Enlargment'
Basically, If You've Had That.. Particular Operation, They Wont Accept You For A Police Offiers Job... Because That Really Matters ;)

x

Russel howard, your my idol. I google image you everyday. seriously, and i was wondering where can i buy a poster of you? do you have a poster out?

btw, i LOVE that eye thing you do. no joke by the way, everyone thinks im being sarcastic but it genuinly turns me on!

thanks x

You have to check this out it is a man who made a KKK snowman and at halloween gave out bullet shells to kids his reaction to the story aswell is priceless

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y_1Tix20u9Q&feature=sub