'King of Pop' is a new 18-track best of CD, which will be compiled from a list of 50 of Michael's most noteworthy songs by fans. The voting is taking place on the Sun's website and on the GMTV site, and the album will be out in time for his 50th birthday on August 29th.

For the record, of the 50 to choose, here's the 12 which just HAVE to be on there.

Billie Jean
Smooth Criminal
I Just Can't Stop Loving You
Thriller
You Are Not Alone
Black Or White
Man In The Mirror
Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough
Beat It
The Way You Make Me Feel
Off The Wall
Rock With You

And here's the 12 we could all probably live without:

The Girl Is Mine
In The Closet
Will You Be There
Earth Song
P.Y.T. (Pretty Young Thing)
Who Is It
Blood On The Dance Floor
Leave Me Alone
Bad
Childhood (Free Willy 2)
History
Dirty Diana
They Don't Care About Us

Which leaves a total of eight songs to pick from the remaining 26.

Now, as I said, I know Michael Jackson is good. The trouble I have is with this self-appointed regal nickname someone decided to give him ages ago, the one they're STILL trying to get us all to use.

The term 'King Of Pop' didn't really start to be used until around Michael's 'Dangerous' album, which came out in 1991. An album which is commonly agreed to be worse than the two which came before it ('Thriller' and 'Bad', since you ask). It also arrived at the point at which the media frenzy around Michael became louder than the music he was making.

This did not stop his record company's PR department* demanding that all publications refer to their helium hitmaker by this title at all times, because, well, that's their job. But they couldn't really make the nickname stick, no matter how often it was repeated. It just felt like someone was trying to overstate how big and important Michael was, like we couldn't work it out for ourselves.

If anything, it probably helped to create the mocking atmosphere towards Michael which was gathering momentum. And seeing as Michael himself seemed to be painfully shy, an arrogant, haughty name like that never suited his character like it would a cockier singer like Prince or Madonna (she could still carry off the King Of Pop crown rather well, donchathink?).

It just felt like hype, on an artist who really did not need to be hyped in any way.

So, even though this hits CD will attempt to stick the words 'Michael', 'Jackson', 'King', 'Of' and 'Pop' together once again, it will still look silly and it still won't work, no matter how good the tunes on the disc.

Thankfully, the CD's cover is every bit as daft, as it shows Michael attempting to walk through a waterfall of blood, or to appear as a Banksy-style grafitti on a tupperware plate.

And it just got me thinking. Seeing as someone is already claiming Michael as THE King of Pop, and attempting to illustrate 'pop' as some kind of red background, why not see if we can secure him a few other tomato-coloured kingdoms while we're at it? I mean, seeing as we're making stuff up, why not go crackers, hmm?

This is a great way to increase Michael's reach into other branded areas. And you can make your own crouton jokes here, if you like.

Well, can you name any of the previous Kings Of Chup? Thought not...

This has probably already happened.

And this probably should have happened a few years ago, before emails/texting/MyFaceBo etc...

This, however, could not be MORE up-to-date. And positions Michael once again at the cutting edge of modern popular music, which as a true artist and visionary, is where he truly belongs etc etc...

Be honest, this would probably be rather good, right?

This, on the other hand, MUST NEVER HAPPEN. It was already the ickiest picture ever, and putting Jacko in there just makes it worse.

Don't worry. I've stopped now. Unless you can think of any other red things Michael can be king of...Mr Strong? Beetroot?

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* I assume it was them. Or his management team. Someone IMPORTANT, anyway...